Researching Reform was very kindly invited to talk about the issues surrounding forced adoption in the UK, by Chloe Lee, a pupil barrister and the host of family law podcasts Voices of Family Law.

During the interview we spoke about the unique nature of adoption policy in the UK, the challenges the system faces in improving family intervention and cases we worked on involving forced adoption.

Chloe asked poignant questions about the ways in which forced adoption affects families and children, and the problems that irrevocable orders cause in the context of child development and parental health.

You can listen to the podcast here.

The podcast is part of a series looking at issues within the family justice system like adoption, transparency and access to justice. The series is an important addition to the growing conversation around family law and child welfare.

For those who use iPhones, you can also download the podcast and the entire series of interviews on Apple Podcasts.

Chloe is a Justice First Fellow at the Legal Education Foundation with a special interest in family law. She will be joining Spire Barristers as a pupil.

You can follow Chloe on Twitter @chloe_lee93 and her Voices of Family Law podcasts @VoicesofFamLaw.

A special thank you to Chloe for having us on her show, and we wish her lots of success with her projects.

Sky News spoke with Researching Reform this afternoon about the need for judges to understand the meanings behind emojis, after a rise in UK cases involving the symbols.

An article published by The Times this morning sparked national media interest in this area. The story, which highlights concerns among legal professionals in the UK that judges are not familiar enough with emoji uses and meanings, includes some thoughts from Researching Reform on what needs to be done to improve that understanding and the current gaps in technology which sites like legal databases also need to address.

We spoke with news presenter Isabel Webster about the use of emojis within family law judgments, as judges try to make child-related orders more accessible and easier for children to understand. We also discussed emojis appearing in evidence, particularly within criminal cases.

Researching Reform spoke with Yahoo UK News, who have written about the need for judges to adapt to changing forms of communication like emojis. We shared some more thoughts with Yahoo this afternoon.

The topic has also been covered by Scottish Legal News, which quotes The Times piece and Researching Reform’s comments about emojis within legal cases.

Twitter followers can catch the latest legal developments over at @JudgeJohnHack, @TheTimes and @TimesLaw.

A very big thank you to Sky News for having us.

A big thank you also to DadsHouse founder Billy McGranaghan for sending us photos of the interview, which we’ve included in this post.

You can watch the interview below.

Mayameen Meftahi was abused by her father throughout her childhood, until he was sentenced in 2011.

The evidence at the trial included over 60 hours of video footage – some of which came from CCTV installed inside bedroom lightbulbs – a diary, and drugs. Her father was later charged with several counts of incest, indecent assault on a female, committing gross indecency with a child and making indecent photographs or pseudo photographs, of a child.

Despite being placed on the sex offenders register for life, her father served only six and half years of a ten year sentence, for violence that spanned over a decade. The conditions of his release include details about Mayameen’s local area, but prevented by the law from knowing her father’s whereabouts, she worries constantly about her family’s safety.

Mayameen, who has waived her right to anonymity, is now campaigning to change the laws around sentencing for child sexual abuse. Her first interview, with That’s Life magazine on 27th September, offers details about the abuse she suffered. On the day of the interview, Mayameen published a video on Facebook talking about her life and explaining why she chose to speak out. The video has since received over 13,000 views.

Mayameen spoke with Researching Reform about her childhood, why sentencing for convicted paedophiles needs to change, and her work combatting sexual violence.

Mayameen, thank you for speaking with us. Can you tell us about what happened to you during your childhood?

My childhood consisted of child sexual abuse from the age of 4 up until my teens, and possibly beyond. As I got older, my father used drugs to continue the abuse. When he was arrested in 2011, the police found drugs, along with other evidence, including videos and a handwritten, detailed diary.

As well as sexual abuse, my father engaged in several forms of controlling behaviour. He was always stalking me, and was a very manipulative presence in my life.  I was never free from the abuse, my childhood was a nightmare and not a time in my life on which I can look back on and smile.

Did you have a positive experience with the authorities you spoke to about your abuse?

I didn’t speak out about my abuse, my father was arrested whilst I was on holiday and I had no idea what was happening back in the UK.  It was only when I received a phone call telling me about what had happened that I found out. I was told, ‘you are safe now, he has been arrested’.

When I returned to the UK, the police were exceptional.  It was a monumental case with the evidence stacked high, and I was well supported by the police until my father was sentenced.

What happened to your abuser?

My father was sentenced to 10 years in prison.

How do you feel about your father’s prison term and the decision to let him out early?

I think his prison term at the time was too lenient. I know the judge’s hands were tied due to sentencing laws, he did make that very clear.  My father served 6 years and was not eligible for either of his paroles in 2016 and 2017. I will never be free from the abuse and so the time he has served in prison, is unjust. He is a prolific sex offender.

Why did you decide to waive your anonymity for That’s Life Magazine?

When my father was being released, I realised then that I would never be free from his sentence, and that’s why I waived my anonymity. I felt strongly that justice hadn’t prevailed. Shortly before his release, I had an instinct to Google his name and I was absolutely flawed to find an article online that publicly named him giving evidence as a trained ‘listener’ for the Samaritans. Given the work that I now do, I made the decision to speak out.

You started the She Can Consultancy to help women exposed to violence – can you tell us about the organisation?

I founded She Can Consultancy as an independent specialised consultancy agency for sexual violence and psychological trauma. As a consultant, I provide expert advice and assistance for professionals, authorities and organisations working with victims. I also provide professional training currently in Female Genital Mutilation, Trauma Informed practices, and I will be looking at providing Sexual Abuse Training also.

Alongside the professional work, I also wrote a 7 week PTSD and Anxiety Recovery Program, which I offer to women via self-referral or as an outreach program for organisations. This has been very successful and provides full understanding of PTSD as well as teaching a number of coping mechanisms to improve survivors’ quality of life after trauma.

 What do you hope to achieve with She Can?

I have launched the #IfSheCanICan campaign to provide a national platform for survivors to speak out safely, to raise the voices of survivors and to pave the way for systematic law changes and better victim protection.  I’m also working on the Child House campaign for Wales, and we’ve just launched a petition asking for Child Houses to be built in Wales, for victims of child sexual abuse.

How do you feel about the current sentencing guidelines for child sex abuse offences?

The current sentencing guidelines are an insult to survivors who live with the life sentence of abuse. The Judge in my case also felt extremely frustrated that he could not impose a longer sentence.  When a victim hears a prison sentence of 10 years, they only process that term, they’re not made aware of the the days deducted due to time on remand, nor do they know that their abuser could end up serving only half their sentence.

The system as it currently stands provides victims with a false sense of hope, for example in my case, that I could expect 10 years of safety, and an opportunity to try and re-build our lives, when in fact ten years often translates to five years, eight years to four, and so on.

It’s a huge injustice, sex offenders should serve their full sentence. It was clear from my case that my father is a danger to the public, his refusal of parole on 2 occasions highlights that, I think. And yet less than 12 months after being refused parole, he was released, because of the law.

What changes would you like to see for victims of child sexual abuse?

I am campaigning for a right in law to allow victims of abuse to be given details, confidentially, of the location of their abusers. I would like to know the location of my father upon his release to minimise my risk. I want to know where his vicinity is, so I can avoid the area as much as possible, in order to protect myself and my family.  My father is aware of the vicinity I am living in due to his licencing conditions, and yet as a victim, I am not given that same right.

I also want to see a change in sentence guidelines that offers better protection to victims of child sexual abuse.

Many of our readers have been abused as children themselves – what would you like to say to them?

Your voice is powerful, being a survivor is a part of your identity and something to be proud of, and your voice deserves to be heard. You are not alone. I would also encourage survivors to speak out, but to do so safely.  I broke my anonymity with my interview in That’s Life Magazine and this put me in the media, which can be a very vulnerable time as you re-live your trauma, but you also enter a new transition. If anyone is feeling burdened by silence, then reach out. I Believe You, I Validate You, You are Powerful.

You can contact the She Can Consultancy on Facebook, or email them at ifshecanican@shecanconsultancy.com. Mayameen is also on Twitter @Mayameen_M.

Ben Westwood ran away from home when he was ten, and found himself bouncing in and out of the care system until he became an adult. In this poignant interview, Ben talks about life sleeping rough as a small boy, the realities of residential and foster care, and why he chose to write a poetry book about his experiences.

Ben also shares thought provoking ideas about how to provide better support for children in care and care leavers, and offers a special message for politicians and policy makers.

The interview features some touching moments, including memorable social workers, and families visiting London who were kind, as well as meeting famous bands and celebrities through chance encounters.

We would like to thank Ben very much for allowing us to interview him.

Ben’s book of poems can be found on Amazon, in paperback, or Kindle edition.

Ben, what was your life like before you entered the care system?

Despite growing up for a few years confused as to who my father actually was and lots of arguing at home between my mum and her then partner, I’d like to think that it was a reasonably normal council-estate kid childhood in many ways, both good and bad.

I got my arm broken at the age of six when a group of older kids jumped me whilst I was playing outside. My mum’s partner at the time thought I needed to learn to look after myself, so would organise fights in the streets with other lads in an attempt to toughen me up.

I never liked to fight however, and I’d be quite reluctant to throw a punch, and it wasn’t until I’d get hit myself that I may just may have thrown a punch back.  Very depressing and something that shouldn’t happen to anyone. No-one should be forced into a fight.

A couple of years later we moved away from that street onto a council estate called the Springfields. One of my neighbours, a couple of years older was a striker for a local football team and needed a goalkeeper to practise with. His shots seemed quite powerful at the time, but after he gave me a few good goalkeeping tips and I fell in love with playing football.

Previous to all that I’d become a little obsessed with the Beatles after we did a school play about the 1960’s in primary school, but now my obsession was football. I was always encouraged to play outside, and I’d love to anyway, but it was around this time when my mum had met her new partner that I began to feel I was encouraged to play out a little too much, and when none of my friends were playing out I started to have a somewhat lonely childhood.

I was around ten years old by now. A lot of my days and weekends were then spent walking around, smoking cigarettes with older lads on the streets and stealing from shops. I’d started to get in trouble at school and I noticed it was stressing my mum out. When I’d got suspended from school I thought it was best for everyone that I left home, and that the first time I ever ran away from home.

How did you find yourself in care?

When I first came back home after running away, it felt like we had all been making an effort to get along for a while. But it wasn’t long until there had been an air of conflict at home and I was running away again.

This time in the middle of the night, and sometimes I had been picked up by the police and taken back and my mum hadn’t even known I’d been missing.

I was usually just walking for miles from town to town, or at least on my way there.

That’s when my mum and her partner thought it was best that I went into care.

What was the experience of being in care like for you?

Overall and in general, quite positive despite a couple of decisions I think social services could have made better, which affected my life, but social workers can only do to the best of their abilities. We can’t expect them to always be magicians, although thankfully I look back at some I had in my life that I consider special people.

I felt more like I could be myself more in care I suppose. The running away stopped initially until one day I was given a day’s notice to move from a foster home I’d really began to feel at home in.

The foster home I moved to was nice, but being the only foster kid in a house full of kids from the same family, I sort of felt a little like an outsider, and that’s when I ran away to London.

I had lived in several other foster homes after that as well as a few children’s homes. In the children’s homes I met some really great social workers that had really helped inspire me, but also quite a bit of red tape which made me sometimes feel a little outside of the reality of other young people.

In an ideal world it would be the same, but I guess it’s hard to get the ideal solution. It would have been nice to be able to go into the fridge and make some food like your mates can at home, and as a teenager it’s really frustrating when you feel your so outside of those basic things.

Every now and then though the staff office would get broken into and the cash tin stolen, so it’s understandable sometimes why things need to get locked away. If only we were living in an ideal world, ay.

My first experience of living in a children’s home was simply because there hadn’t been any foster placements available at the time.

The staff there were great but I quickly began feeling unsettled and getting in all sorts of trouble inside and outside of the home.

I still had a great time living at the home, and there were some very memorable social workers, but there just aren’t enough foster parents available on standby for confused and unsettled kids like I was.

Life in care could have certainly been a lot worse though. Coming from a background where pocket money and trips out doing what other kids do was pretty much non-existent until I went into care.

So when your foster parents tell you that social services have given you some money to spend on clothing and toiletries, or when the staff in the children’s home take you out on activity days, deep down a lot of kids in care really appreciate that I think.

Looking back overall, I feel I was extremely lucky to come across so many great foster parents and social workers, as well as many of the other kids in care that I’d also got to know. Quite a social life I guess.

Why did you run away?

I think that’s a question that has many factors to it, of which not many I could explain or was even conscious of at the time.

When I first started running away it was mainly to get away from the feelings of conflict at home. At my first two placements I never actually ran away, but I think by the time I’d got to my third foster home where I was in my own mind feeling a little bit like the outsider, I had wanted to live my life in independence free from any negative feelings or conflict was the honest truth.

By time I started running away to London and sleeping rough running away had become a regular thing. I’d just become very unsettled I guess, especially whilst in the children’s homes.

What is life like for a small boy sleeping rough?

Where do I start? Chaotic, yet lonely.

I think it’s affected my mental health in adult life a little, having to stay so on high-alert. Most people can lay in bed still when being awoken by a noise, but twenty years on I still shoot up out of bed and that’s me awake for many hours.

That’s what happens when you spend your mornings having to be moved by street cleaners or people trying to get into the inside of their shops.

At times it was very lonely, especially at times when I hadn’t eaten for days nor slept for weeks. I’d be pleading out for help to people whilst crying and starving and I had my days where nobody helped me or even spoke to me.

It’s strange to think a twelve or thirteen year old lad could go through such an experience during the 1990’s, but from personal experience I can tell you they do.

I’d been extremely lucky to have met a passing stranger that had warned me about the drug pushers in the west end that would offer me drugs for free and get me hooked. That advice was soon thankfully needed when the odd drug pusher did soon approach me.

I came across my fair share of sexual exploiters and predators during my time sleeping rough on the streets. Some would come up to me openly with cash and ask me to do sex acts whilst others took a more devious approach, of which one I’ve written about in the book where I was befriended and spiked before fending the man off. I don’t know how I did it to be honest I was so out of it, adrenaline or something maybe.

It wasn’t all dark and depressing however, and in many ways in which I really don’t want to glamourise I was lucky to have come across a few good souls who really showed me a lot of love. Without those people of all ages in my life who had become friends during my time on the streets, it would have been a completely different experience.

Thankfully I knew the areas to avoid in the west end where the social effects of hardcore drugs were at their worst. I did sleep rough in places such as Soho and Tottenham Court Road a few times, but not very often because when most people go home at the end of the night you see how dodgy things can really get. Certainly not a safe place to be for a young teenager like me.

In the end, through many series of depressing and traumatic events you learn to develop a thick skin in a way. There were times I had cardboard over me and I had awoken to the sounds of drunk people urinating on it, or other older homeless people trying to bully me off my patch, you learn to deal with it in the end, and life on the streets can quickly change with people moving on to other places in life.

As a young runaway it was difficult to open up to people about who I really was. When people did come and ask me about why I was living on the streets, I’d have to lie about my age and make up stories.

That sort of got in the way of things looking back now, it was hard to truly open up to people about anything really just in fear of being caught and taken back home. I did try to remain as true to myself as possible, but I ended up pulling all sorts of tricks to stay undetected such as fake names and accents so that the police wouldn’t find me.

I think in a subtle way it put up a few invisible barriers at times with me and other people. Not to say I hadn’t connected with some people, but I was waiting for the day I was sixteen and didn’t have to pretend to anybody anymore.

Were there any good moments you remember?

Yeah, quite a few to be honest, in my own way despite all the depressing and traumatic stuff I went through, I had a sort of adventure.

One lady that was staying in the Athenaeum hotel on Piccadilly would come and play scrabble with me on the street.

I met a famous rock band just before they got famous. I thought they were just fibbing  until we got to their hotel room and I saw the guitars and stuff everywhere. They invited me to be their roadie on tour but the paper I had written their number on had got damaged in the rain.

One of the memories I treasure most was when a family came over from Florida and were staying in the Park Lane Hotel on Piccadilly. After their kids dropping me off some breakfast whilst I was asleep in a doorway I met the whole family whom I bonded with for a few days.

It was one of those ‘hard to say goodbye’ moments when they left and just something to me that feels really memorable and touching.

There were heaps more good moments. I was lucky to have some brief friendships with people from different countries and cultures, I met a few more celebrities briefly, street parties at Piccadilly Circus. I could go on forever.

What was the worst experience you had during this period?

I think it was the initially event that led me to start sleeping rough in Central London that was the worst. I’d been befriended by a guy in a homeless day centre that offered me somewhere to stay. A couple of days later he held me up with a machete, locked me in his flat and when I shouted out of the window for help I was ignored by a member of the public.

Getting sick whilst living on the streets during the winter was a tough one, there were times I thought I might die whilst living on the streets and I’d have to drag myself off to hospital with a fake name and date of birth. That along with the sleep deprivation and a poor diet at times meant it was quite a desperate and bizarre experience at times.

It was something I went through pretty much on my own.

You chose to write a book of poems about your experience – why poetry rather than prose?

Certain friends and people I’ve met in life that have got to know me have mentioned for years that I should write a book about my childhood story about living on the streets. I’ve even tried a few times, but I’m more than aware of what happens to me when I bring up old feelings.

I can willingly chat in depth to a friend about some of my stories on the streets, but what tends to happen is that without realising it for a few days, I can easily become depressed and malfunction. I knew that if I did a book in poetry, I’d sort of have another challenge to focus on instead of simply writing about the same old memory in a usual way.

I was  worried after writing the poem about being kidnapped that I’d get a malfunction and had given myself a few days in advance to have a break if needed, but thankfully writing it in poetry had helped and I managed to carry on writing the book with the same passion I had before.

There was another reason also for me writing it in poetry, and that was because I wanted to create a book that was easily readable and perhaps I’d get a few people into reading that hadn’t read for a while as well as gaining support from regular book lovers.

Some of my earliest childhood memories were of reading old A.A. Milne poetry books that were in my toy box. He’s the guy that’s better known for writing Winnie-The-Poo, but what had inspired me was his poetry about London’s homeless sleeping on park benches and getting wet in the rain.

I’d not really accessed these memories at all until one day I started writing a poem which is in the book called ‘Free Drinks On Haymarket’. It’s about me being around thirteen and walking into a Sports Bar on Haymarket and telling the barman I was a footballer playing for Walsall FC reserves and in London for a football match against Millwall.

After having a little chuckle as I was reminiscing about old times, I thought that by adding a little humour to it that not only would it be a fun experience for me to write but that it would also reflect when people read it, instead of it just being a sad story.

What kind of impact would you like the poems to have?

There are a few things really, mainly though I just want to shed some light into the mind of a young runaway going through the foster care system.

There were many times I’d felt unable to share my true feelings to foster parents and social workers, but here I am writing a book in hindsight and baring all after finally becoming conscious of it.

I know there are other kids going through the same. For whatever reason social workers are baffled as to why kids are always running away or truanting and maybe in a way my book will help gain some insight to those working with young people similar to how I was.

I think also some of my stories are useful to know for those helping to find missing teenagers such as the police and other organisations.

To think I was managing to maintain a life sleeping rough in the middle of London and evading police by giving fake names and speaking fake accents surely must mean I can’t be the only one.

Also I think this book sheds a light on what it’s like to be a rough sleeper of any age. I certainly had my moments of experience homeless stigma like not being allowed into certain shops or cafes because I often had a big rucksack with a sleeping bag poking out of it.

If you could deliver a message to our politicians, what would it be?

#EveryChildLeavingCareMatters

Ok, so by the time people are sixteen to eighteen  they aren’t children anymore but young people. But I do believe a much needed message also beams out of this trending Twitter hashtag.

I think it’s hard for a young person to understand how much support they’ll need in their adult life. There are some people out there that have done quite well for themselves, but I don’t think anyone can say they’ve done anything truly on their own.

Whether it’s emotional support and advice or practical, there are a lot of people that leave the care system to then go on spending their whole adult lives often struggling to know where to even begin with the most basic of support.

It’s a shame that many people I’ve met and myself included, can leave care and just hope and pray for any sort of support that comes their way.

It can take many years to know ourselves and understand the effects of what we’ve been through. Some people themselves don’t even understand what they’ve been through until they’ve got older which is why I think there needs to be more support for people that grew up in care.

Often with nobody to turn to, at least we could get a letter every ten years asking if we were alright or needed any sort of support.

I’m one of the lucky ones that’s managed to get through writing a book and publishing it through the kindness of people I don’t even know very well, and much of it through pleas on the internet.

Along with my music and social media rantings I guess I make it easier for people to feel they can trust me.

But there’s millions of people in the world not as fortunate to have gone down the same path, and feel they have nowhere to turn.

Then we lock them up for selfish and antisocial behaviour after we’ve taught them to live in a dog eat dog world where no-one’s going to look out for them but themselves.

A lot of the homeless I met living on the streets were care leavers, but I don’t think it would happen if they were someone at least offered the chance of guidance and support through their adult years.

Not everyone can be healed by 21, or 25. It would be ideal if they were, but we shouldn’t give up so easily on people that have hopes and dreams, however basic.

Thank you so much, Ben.

Ben also has a website, where he blogs about his life as a runaway, and can be found chatting away on Twitter about child welfare and people who inspire him.

Yesterday, London Live very kindly interviewed Researching Reform on how to protect children during separation, and what alternatives currently exist for couples wanting to steer clear of the court process.

Presenter Anthony Baxter began by saying that January is often referred to as Divorce Month, due to the high rate of divorce queries lawyers see at this time. Anthony asked several questions about what the alternatives to hiring a lawyer might be and what options were in the best interests of children caught in the middle of a separation.

We mentioned that couples had a variety of options to choose from, including mediation. We also suggested that couples look to their inner circle of friends and family to see if they had anyone the couple as a whole trusted to be impartial and balanced, and support them in reaching sensible, positive solutions for themselves and their children.

We also explained that mediation, which has been encouraged by the government as a pre-emptive measure to help steer people away from the court process, is only helpful if the couple are comfortable enough with each other to sit down together and negotiate. For that to happen, a certain amount of trust is necessary. Trust though, is often missing in relationship breakdown scenarios. Deep feelings of pain and distress can often block any kind of negotiation, which is also the reason why the government’s mediation drive has failed so miserably. Mediation then, is not for high conflict couples, or couples where at least one party is vulnerable.

After discussing alternatives to the court process, we also addressed the myth that going to court was in some way about achieving justice, and getting some kind of closure for wrongdoings parties experienced in their relationship. The reality, as we explained, is that family courts do not offer justice in the conventional sense and the idea that there might be a winner and a loser is also misplaced. We told London Live that the process was not about supporting families’ emotional distress and helping them to right wrongs and that couples needed to bear this in mind when contemplating court proceedings.

We also spoke about ways to avoid distressing children during separation. One of the suggestions we offered was to try to look at the process from a child’s perspective. We mentioned that whilst it was natural and normal for deeply upset couples to consider using their children to hurt one another, taking a step back and asking whether their actions might also hurt their child was a practical and easy way to reconsider doing anything rash.

Thank you so much to Anthony and London Live for inviting us to come onto the show, it was a huge privilege to be able to discuss this area.

For more thought provoking stories, Editor’s Choice offers interesting articles, and catch London Live presenter Anthony over on Twitter, where he shares up to the minute news (and photos of his very sweet dog, Yolk).

 

 

 

French news channel France 2 recently spoke with Researching Reform about how a growing emphasis on exams has been affecting children in the UK.

The programme looks at how children around the world are coping with different types of testing and the frequency with which they are tested, as well as an in depth look at state schools versus private schools. The UK portion of the programme investigates our own two-tier system, which effectively still stigmatises state school graduates – most of the ‘top jobs’ in the country still go to those who have been privately educated.

During our segment we talk about the added pressure children now face to perform, the negative effects of unhealthy levels of competition, which include mental health difficulties like depression and anxiety disorders and the terrible catch 22 parents now face when trying to get their children into good schools in their area, who feel they need to push their children harder than ever to secure places in these schools.

We would like to thank Nic Boothby, and the amazing team at France 2 for interviewing us.

[This programme is in French].

As the first organisation in Europe to provide accommodation for single fathers, DadsHouse has pioneered support for dads, and through its tireless work, won support across the country from celebrities to family charities.

On Friday 15th January, 2016, DadsHouse founder Billy McGranaghan will be talking to London Live about his work, his latest project to house single fathers and why housing is so important, not just for dads but for their children, too. Researching Reform, which works as a consultant to DadsHouse, will be joining Billy on Friday, to discuss the significance of the project and its importance in keeping families together.

The interview is set for 12.50pm on London Live. If you’d like to watch it, you can do so here, or  via their YouTube channel. London Live can also be accessed on Freeview 8, Sky 117, Virgin 159 and YouView 8.

Continuing with our Interview series, we speak with a father who has been denied contact with his son. The case was processed through the Court of Protection, and raises Child Rights concerns as well as persisting difficulties in assessing capacity.

We would like to thank this father for his courage in sitting for this interview.

In line with reporting restrictions and the protection of child privacy, interviews which focus on individual cases are anonymous and edited to avoid identification of minors.

Which court did you experience?

It first was in Family Court but, was later moved in the Court of Protection by a family member. The case involved my son. [Referred to as A in this interview].

How did you find yourself and your family going through the system?

A family member brought these Proceedings in 2006. Her conduct during the process was dishonest but the social care professionals believed her and sided with her. I only went to these Hearings for a “battering and a bruising”, while I did nothing wrong. No Judgements have any criticisms of me except the last one which states “I interfere with [my son’s] Capacity and that has to be protected”, while the family member got unsupervised contact.

What was it about the process that you did not feel was right?

They forced my son out for a Trial which failed badly (Obesity, bad behaviour, Poor Care, Violence and losing contact) and once I complained, that was a crime and I was then branded and treated like a criminal, While the Neglect was all covered-up. He came home for the weekends but was stopped by the social worker and the family member, who got yet more contact. The Proceedings were always about Best Interests and everything pointed to my son returning home but, the family member concerned continued to be dishonest and then the OS, the prejudicial Judge and the LA decided to use Capacity in order to prevent him from coming back home. How can he make the decision to see us, if he lacks such capacity and if he was to make that decision and tell the social worker, how is she going to allow it if she criticizes the family member for “encouraging” him to speak to me on the phone?

Once the adult family member in this case said that my son told her he did not wish to see me again, that was taken as fact but, that was not true. The Judge now bewilderingly refuses to make an Order for Contact to resume while we “always” sent him back to the Placement after he spent the weekends with us. I made three Statements with all the Facts and Evidence but, they were never read or responded to. Care Home Staff and their Advocate made Statements but, they were never cross-examined about the contents were taken as fact. My son was not involved in the Proceedings. He did not come to Court. All we had was “hearsay” evidence.   

What observations did you make, good and bad, about the process?

Once the Proceedings started in 2006, they could not find anything wrong with my son’s Care and Residence. They decided to allow him to stay with us in 2009 but, the family member continued being dishonest and that fooled the Independent Social Workers, Social Workers, Advocate, The Official Solicitor and the Judge. The Independent Psychiatrist made the correct Findings on Capacity but, it was refuted by the Judge. This Social Worker did not study the mind and brain and the NHS Psychiatrist works alongside the Local Authority Staff in the same building everyday. This Assessment is full of wrong responses allegedly given by my son. Why was it not carried out in a Neutral Venue? Why was it done during a time when we had No Contact? Where is the “recording” of this Assessment to confirm that my son said these things? My son said negative things about us to the Independent Psychiatrist but, could not explain why he said them, he therefore, cannot understand “empathy” and I believe he was told to say these absurd things. Now I can be arrested if I meet my son and take him home, even if he was to come home on his own. It is absurd.

Do you think the system was supportive of your family and understood the issues involved in your case?

From this one-sided experience in the CoP and after chatting with many other Families on Social Networking Groups, we have no confidence in the manner in which inhumane injustice is delivered upon us. Judges needs to make their own decisions based on “factual evidence” rather than accept “hearsay” and not follow the OS, the LA and dubious character assessments of individuals involved, while breaching children’s, and our Human Rights. The OS made many disproportionate statements which were accepted by the Judge; one was “When A lived with his father, his father had an Article 8 Right but, since A does not live with him any more, he has no Article 8 Right any more”.

How child friendly did you feel the system was?

In my view, Family Law needs reforming with Family involved and Human Rights being respected as my son was not involved in these Proceedings. His voice voice was muted. The Judge never saw him at all and I fail to see how can a Judge make decisions for him without his views or voice being heard. That cannot be Best Interests. We Alienated Families have voiced this in our responses to the Dept. of Health Publication ‘No Voice Unheard- No Rights Ignored’ and this is being reviewed by the Law Commission before being sent to Parliament to consider, in reforming Family Law.

Was the system able to understand the needs of any children involved?

I do not believe that the System is fair and just. Judges seems to take the “easy route” rather go on a “fact finding” mission. For far too long Local Authorities , Official Solicitors and CAFCASS all collude and the Judges went along and it is only when things go horribly wrong, like a child dies, or some higher Body complains or it is exposed on the Media, then the Case is handled properly. For example, the Stephen Neary Case. G&E, the Bournewood Case and the Winterbourne Abuse.

Did you feel you experienced any forms of bias or prejudice during the process?

Off course the Judge was “biased and prejudiced” as she refused to make an Order for Contact to resume and refused Appeals on grounds I didn’t feel were right. I believe that Proceedings should be overseen by an impartial Body or even the Press for the right outcome to delivered.

How efficient did you find the administrative side of the process?

The Publishing of Judgements needs to be more open especially to the Press. In my case, it would have been helpful to publish earlier Judgements which speak very positively about my conduct. This seems to have be hidden from the public domain. The Public should be able to know that I’m not a criminal so, so why treat me like one?

What would you like to change about the system?

The Findings from the Department of Health, “No Voice Unheard and No Rights Ignored”, and Findings from ‘Monitoring the Mental Health Act 2014/15 by the Care Quality Commission and the United Nation Committee on Disabled People Human Rights is overwhelming in Family favour. Almost every aspect/clause points unanimously in Family Involvement, Nearest Relative, Human Rights respected, a Plan to return home                and or live closer to home while on the other hand we are Alienated from our loved ones forever and we are told “all is well” while, the poorest of care and abuse is delivered  behind our backs. The ‘Secret Behind Closed Doors System’ has to go. The Press must be allowed in and truly independent Bodies involved in order for a Fair Trial to be                         delivered.